What'd I miss? P2: This cruise is Joco Crazy

I never went to any of the Joco Karaoke shows, once because it corresponded with Famous Tracy's scrabble battle against John Hodgman, and once because we were getting the queen's consort, Nick, completely sloshed on sake. I've seen a good number of the videos of the karaoke, but my favorite was this one, as recorded by Sara Chicazul:



(The video lives here.)

EDIT: here are the official lyrics, which were posted in the video's notes, but somehow I missed that, like a dummy.

JOCO CRUISE CRAZY (reinterpreted "Tom Cruise Crazy" lyrics)
By Table 73

Our cruise is so in love with Coulton,
At least Wil Wheaton tells us so.
And while other cruisers dance to Michael Bolton,
That's not the way we choose to go.

A closetful of geeky shirts is proving a distraction,
It's a good thing we're not fanboys anymore.

REFRAIN (John Hodgman):
Our cruise is JoCo Crazy, just be glad it's not the crew.
If you had John Hodgman's troubles, you might be JoCo Crazy too.
We'll flash a big white shiny badge and buy expensive booze,
And we'll be the only ones on board who get to enjoy the cruise.

JoCo is always getting bolder, he'll never be no one again.
When Paul F. Tompkins gives him the cold shoulder,
He'll get a new comedian.

He knows some day he'll have to play to old retarded grandpas,
While someone younger wears the fancy pants.

REFRAIN (Mike Phirman):
Our cruise is JoCo Crazy, just be glad it's not the crew.
If you had Mike Phirman's troubles, you might be JoCo Crazy too.
We'll flash a big white shiny badge and buy expensive booze,
And we'll be the only ones on board who get to enjoy the cruise.

JoCo knows somewhere there's a place for him,
He's not just landbound anymore

Somewhere in some secluded cabin, Rees sharpens pencils artisanal
And if you use wi-fi you'll get a stabbin'-- we just won't go online at all.

We hundreds are glad we came, and JoCo knows we love him,
And wishes that we'd just leave him alone.

REFRAIN (Molly Lewis):
Our cruise is JoCo Crazy, just be glad it's not the crew.
If you had Molly Lewis's troubles, you might be JoCo Crazy too.
We'll flash a big white shiny badge and buy expensive booze,
And we'll be the only ones on board who get to enjoy the cruise....who get to enjoy the cruise...who get to enjoy the cruise.